Here we come Dave!

So, the Dave Matthews concert is tonight. As of yesterday, our sitter's son was running a fever, so we are on hold, fingers crossed. Clark tells me that if she falls through, he thinks his male, 23 year old assistant should be able to swing it. Sounds a little iffy, but at this point, beggars are not choosers. I was just cruising the Journal Pavilion site, and am excited to check out the venue. Having lived in a small town for 15 years with NO decent live music, it's really exciting to be able to just drive across town to see a concert. We were assured that the lawn seating was the way to go, so now I'm feeling like I should run out and buy a nice blanket (water proof, as we might be getting a little rain this afternoon), and some of those cool seats that you can sit on the ground and still have some back support. Madeline is on a short day today though, and if I am going to get serious about it, I'd have to go like right now. I'm excited. And a little stressed. Unfortunately, when you have kids, any venture like this comes with stress. It's also 'curriculum night' at Madeline's school. Kinda like back to school night I guess, but for parents only. Bring on the juggling act. I'd really like to check out the home of the person watching the kids (oh, yeah, and actually meet her, that might be nice too), but I think it would make more sense for Clark to haul the kids out there while I go to the school. We'll see. Hopefully there won't be too much trauma along the way. Wish me luck!

My turn!!

Seven things I plan to do before I die
(sorry, I'm gonna share a couple with Missuz J)
sit on a rock in Point Lobos with Boobecca
travel to the land of my birth, Christchurch, New Zealand
go to Europe with my husband
go on a real vacation with my bestest bud Stine
get my yoga teaching certification
go back to school
learn to unconditionally accept my mother

Seven things I can do
ski (who'da thunk it?)
do a pretty killer triangle pose
love my children
fold clothes really well
keep in touch with Stine, even though we haven't lived in the same town in almost 10 years
teach a yoga class
judge myself more harshly than anyone else would

Seven things I cannot do
full lotus pose
handstand
ski moguls
stop missing Boobecca and Sophie like crazy every day
act, or perform at all really, without feeling uncomfortable
sing like Boo
get a regular yoga practice established at home (yet!)

Seven things I say most often
Jesus Christ (but always only in my head, weird)
oh, stink! (child-friendly version of oh, shit!)
Zachy, do you need to potty?
I love you so
you two play nice
three more bites (to my non-eater, Madeline)
actually

Seven things that attract me to the opposite sex
ability to make me laugh
willingness to get real
tolerance of my eccentricities
nice upper body
strong arms
good daddy
good provider

Seven celebrity crushes
Viggo Mortensen (just finished watching Lord of the Rings trilogy extended version, yummy)
the guy who played Eomer, Karl something (can't get off that L ot R kick yet)
Keifer Sutherland
Leonardo Dicaprio
Prince
David Bowie
Johnny Depp

Seven people who I want to do this
(shoot! everyone's done it!)
my husband
my mother
my father
my brother
Matthew Bromund (do it do it)
tourjete (have you been tagged yet? I just want you to blog again)
my daughter's teacher, that'd be interesting

WOW, I actually got 7 of everything, reaching there on some of them, but I wasn't sure I'd actually be able to do it. That was fun. Usually I'm crap at doing these things. I'll try to gather up my 5 fav songs soon, that one sounds fun too.

Trying out this Picture thing

OK, told myself I would figure this out by the end of the week, and lo, the end of the week is upon us. I'll start with a couple I have had on the computer for years, since I still can't figure out my stupid Kodak disc. Here goes...

This is an old one of Madeline, taken when she was about 2, I think.

Baby Zach. Aww, he was so little!

And, the dynamic duo in action. This was Zach's 1st birthday.

So, there they are, the Krause Kids. Hope you enjoy their sweet faces as much as I do!

I'll take 'better'

It was a better day today. Not great, but better. Actually got to go to my midweek yoga class last night which has been unusually elusive the last few weeks. My new yoga teacher rocks my world. It was a really good class. For some reason, he tends to do more traditional poses on Wednesday, which makes me feel like I know what I'm doing for once. Madeline got up without me having to fight with her. We did forget her library book, but that ended up being ok, because when we went back to the school to drop it off, we noticed that they are looking for parent helpers in the 1st grade reading room, and I marched right in and volunteered. Big deal for me. I typically have a really hard time putting myself out there like that, but it's time. I need to start connecting with people outside these 4 walls again. So, Zach and I are stopping by tomorrow morning to help get books ready for little readers.

The afternoon wasn't so great, but it wasn't horrible either. We set up a lunch date with Clark, and were going to meet at Weck's a little after one. We managed to get out the door in good time, and I thought I'd try a shortcut to the restaurant. Traffic was backed up for blocks right in the middle of my shortcut. dang. So, we backtracked and decided to take the regular way. Blocked again. Called Clark, and apparently there was a huge funeral procession headed down the highway and the freeway was closed. Last week in Albuquerque, a crazy guy murdered 5 people in one day, 2 of which were police officers, and this was the last funeral, for one of the officers. So sad. It ended up taking us almost an hour to get to the restaurant. A drive that should have taken about 5 minutes. We missed lunch with Clark, which was a bummer, and by then it was getting close to school pickup time. I didn't want to go all the way home just to turn around an leave again, so we popped into Whole Foods to browse and grab some snacks before picking up the girl. Love that store. I still don't know what's for dinner though. I might just set out all the yummy fruits and veggies and snackies that we got, and call it good. Lazy mommy.

Thanks so much for all your kind comments yesterday. It really made me feel like I'm not in this all alone, even if I can't drop my kids at any of your houses for a couple hours. Hey, I'll take what I can get.

Bleh

I feel like I should somehow explain my current absence from this blog. But I don't have any good excuses. Last week I was painting, which is a semi-excuse, as things were a little torn apart here in the bedroom, but mostly I've just been feeling uninspired. I've been having more mad/sad moments lately than I really care to share. I'm hating Albuquerque more than I have been for awhile. Tonight is my mom's birthday, and they're having cake at Boobecca's, Katy bringing her date du jour. And I'm missing it. It really makes me want to bawl. I'm realizing that blogging is the best way I have of keeping in touch with my sweet sisters, and I am dropping the ball. I check on their sites every day, and cherish the insights they give me into their lives. So, in the spirit of giving it the ole college try, I'll eek out a quick recap of the goings on here in the Krause House.

School seems to be going well for Madeline. At the beginning of last week, I was worrying because her work was being sent home sadly uncompleted. I was worried that we were going to go through the whole issue of her not being willing to work at school again. Those worries seem to have been unfounded, thank god. Her last few days of work last week were stellar. I can tell she's really trying hard and doing everything as she's supposed to. Her teacher actually told me she's one of the top students in the class. YAY!!! We're still battling in the mornings, this morning being particularly heinous, but in general she seems happier, and more willing to be compliant when I ask her to. Zach is happy to have mom and the house to himself for most of the day, although it hasn't made him learn how to crap in the toilet any quicker. This week is officially no more trainers week, please, whatever potty training gods are out there, help me.

As I mentioned before, I painted a wall in my bedroom last week. I know it doesn't sound like much, but our bedroom is kindof huge, and the one wall took about 5 days (a couple hours here an there, as any project being completed by a mom seems to be), and a whole gallon of paint. It's better than the white, but it still needs something. Again, uninspired. I've always had a hard time figuring out what to put on the wall above the bed, and in the 10 years or so that Clark and I have shared a bedroom, I don't think I've ever hung anything above up there, for fear of putting up something that I'll hate. And again, with the perfectionism. Bleh

Clark was out of town last week for 3 nights. I HATE it when he's out of town. He has always had jobs that take him on the road on occasion, but it's been particularly difficult lately. Part of which is probably being stuck here in a town where I have no support system. In Cedar, I could always crash mom's or Becky's for dinner, or just to let the kids terrorize someone else's house for a couple hours. Here, it's all me, all the time. This has actually been underlying a lot of my mad/sad issues the last week or so. Two things really triggered it hard. One, Clark got us tickets for Dave Matthews next week at the Journal Pavilion. I've wanted to see Dave Matthews for a LONG time, and when I heard he was going to be here a few months ago I told Clark, we definitely need to see it. He was a dear and hooked up the tickets, since I get all stressed when it comes to putting a credit card number on the computer. So, the time to get a sitter starts getting closer and closer. We call the ONE girl here we know, and of course she will be going to the concert. I think Clark has arranged something, but it requires us taking the kids to someone's house I don't know, and leaving them there until pretty late, on a school night. Not exactly ideal. The second thing was trying to arrange a weekend for me to go to Seattle in November. NOVEMBER, people! 3 months from now. You'd think I was trying to go to Antarctica for a month or something. The hardest thing about both these situations was how completely out of control and powerless I am feeling about being able to be in charge of my own time. I am a slave to my children. I have no one here to help me. I can't take a break, even if I had anything to do. Clark tries really hard, but sometimes it's not enough. OK, now I really am going to bawl.

Monday Morning you sure look fine

It's much earlier than I typically like to get up on a Monday morning, but Clark left his #2 alarm on when he left for the gym at 5:30, so I got to scramble to turn off HIS alarm at 7. Initially, this didn't make me very happy, as you can imagine, especially since I was having a particularly hard time dozing off for another hour. Then, I start to hear this funny noise. It seems a little cloudy, could it be thunder? Nooo, don't think so. A car engine? Not quite. What it really sounds like is a hot air balloon, but one would have to be practically in my front yard to hear it fire like that. I peek out the window in our bedroom that faces the Balloon Fiesta Park, and don't see anything. Not surprising, since it is pretty cloudy, and I didn't think they went up in inclement weather. Then, I hear the noise again. Not front yard, back yard. I open up the sliding glass door that leads to the little balcony off the master bedroom, and there is a huge, orange hot air balloon floating fairly low, and incredibly close to our neighborhood. Wow. That's pretty cool. I can actually see the flames firing. So, I stand out on my little balcony and watch it for a few minutes, breathing in the cool morning air. Now, as I look out the window again, I can see 5 little hot air balloon friends way out to the west, and one more popping up from the Fiesta Park. Sometimes it's very cool to be up early in Albuquerque.

Anger Management

Oh My God. Yesterday was such a bitch. On a Friday, even. Now, that's just not right.

OK, I realize that I've been on a bit of a short fuse as far as the anger thing goes lately, and I've been trying to work on it. My first anger management challenge happened as I was dropping Madeline off at school. We decided to go for the new drop off and pick up lane by the playground. I was not at all convinced when I first heard of said new lane that it would work at all. It looked like way too small a space for the amount of kids and cars flowing through on a twice daily basis. Anyhoo, I pull in, hop out of the car, open Madeline's door, help her out, get her backpack on her, kiss her goodbye, give her a few reassuring words, and send her on her way. Right about then I hear "Ma'am." Now, at first I didn't really react, cause I don't consider myself a 'ma'am', but when I hear it again, a little more firmly, I stop getting back into the car and look around. There's a woman in a uniform staring at me (police? I don't know), and she says to me, with a smile, "You're blocking traffic." WHAT? Excuse me? It's the SECOND day of school, and I WILL give my kid a kiss goodbye, you biatch! So, I stare right back, and say curtly, "I'm leaving now."

As I was driving away, I'd be surprised if you couldn't see the steam rising out of my ears and drifting out through the window. I was considering A) driving back around and giving her a piece of my mind, B) going into the school and complaining to anyone who was around about the bitch directing traffic, or C) call the principal and resoundingly denounce the new drop off lane as ridiculous and emotionally scarring. Then I took a deep breath, told myself maybe she was just trying to do her job, and me being a psycho probably wasn't going to help the situation at all, so I did D) proceed directly to the Starbuck's drive thru for a medicinal mocha. Anger management crisis averted. (Tip experts, any opinion on tipping in the drive thru? They have a tip jar out, and I drop a tip about half the time, but somehow tipping in the drive thru seems weird to me.)

The day went pretty smoothly. I vacuumed the hell out of my bedroom, with a certain sense of satisfaction that I wasn't going to wake up the next day and find it all covered in black cat hair again. I worked on a project I've been doing for Madeline's room, a new cool fabric and ribbon covered bulletin board. I think they call them French ribbon boards? For displaying her schoolwork and art projects. I had told her I would have it done by the time she got home, but it turned out we needed LOTS more ribbon than I had purchased. So, I decided, if she was up to it, we'd cruise by the fabric store on the way home. It was pretty out of the way, but I wanted to get it done, and it turned out she was up for it, so off we go. Unfortunately, the fabric store only had one more spool of the ribbon we needed, and I kinda thought we'd probably need 2, but we grabbed the one and headed home.

Part two of the anger management challenge happened on the way home. We were headed down Montgomery, at about quarter to 5. The traffic was starting to get a little heavy, but we needed milk and eggs, so we were going to stop by the grocery store real quick. I'm cruising along, minding my own business, when the car in front of me decelerates fairly rapidly. It looked like the car in front of him was making a left decided he really didn't have time to beat that car coming toward him, and hit the brakes, so we were all doing the hurry up and slow down thing. (Can you see where this is going?) I say to the kids "Oh! Hold on!" and brake firmly. Now, I didn't slam on the brakes, but as the guy in front of me has now stopped, I did stop quickly in order to avoid hitting him. Unfortunately, the guy behind me wasn't paying such good attention (and was obviously following too closely), and I hear a screech, then a crunch as he HIT MY CAR. Fuck Fuck Fuck. I ask the kids if they're ok, and seeing how we're in pretty heavy traffic at this point, proceed to carefully and quickly move to the side of the road. As I am doing this, I see the guy who HIT MY CAR, driving away. God Damn MFing ASSHOLE! I grab a pen and jot down his license plate number as he LEAVES THE SCENE OF THE ACCIDENT.

I am freaking out by this point, and I call Clark. I hadn't even got out of the car to assess the damage. He tells me I need to call 911. I wasn't too keen on that, as it wasn't really an emergency, but say I'll call information and see if they can connect me to dispatch. I get off the phone with him, and hop out of the car to see how badly we've been crunched. Amazingly, I couldn't even tell where we'd been hit, which helped cool the anger a tad, but still. I called the police (finally got through on the second number I called), and they say they're going to send someone over. Of course, you can't really tell how much a car is damaged until you get it up and look under it, so we're now waiting for the cops to come so we can file a report. A nice guy stopped by who had witnessed the accident to give me the jerk's license number, which I was glad to see matched the one I had written down. We ended up waiting for the police for AN HOUR. At which time, Clark showed up from work. We called back the cops, and they said no one was on the way yet, and if we wanted we could file a report at any police station within 5 days. So, I'm going to have to go in tomorrow.

After sitting in the car seething for an hour with two hot cranky kids, I had mostly exhausted my supply of anger. I was totally wiped out, and had a throbbing headache, which was only slight alleviated by Friday night pizza and ice cream. (We finally found a place in Albuquerque for the Krause House Friday night tradition, which is a very good thing.) Today I still have the headache, which could be just stress, or could be some mild whiplash. Another reason to file the police report.

I tried to go to a restorative yoga class this morning, but it was cancelled. Bummer, but no immediate angry reaction. Maybe I'm out. Although if my kids keep jumping on my bed, I may have to dig deep into the reserves. Hopefully tomorrow will be better, and I can stop worrying about the whole thing once the police report is filed. Although we probably should have the car checked out. I hope it's ok. And, I hope the asshole's car is SMASHED!

First day of freedom ..er.. school

Madeline was successfully delivered to school on time and in good spirits today. Yesterday was rough. I'm having a hard time with her attitude lately. It seems like she's constantly complaining, and forever on the verge of an emotional meltdown, and my patience has been rapidly dwindling. She can be such a little manipulator. Last night, I was asking her (for the FIFTH time) to get in the tub, and, while I wasn't yelling at her (yet), my tone was obviously getting more firm. She starts bawling, cowering on the floor, and says, "You're scaring me!" WHAT?? I was intentionally, and with much effort I must say, keeping from losing my temper, and she throws that out? I hear a lot of, "you're hurting my feelings" too. I tried to explain to her that if she'd just do what I asked her WHEN I asked her, I wouldn't ever have to raise my voice. She gets upset and says I'm yelling at her, and lecturing. (I was not yelling, and only a little lecturing.) I tell her I'm trying to explain this to her because I respect her, and I want her to understand. That if she'd try to respect me too, we wouldn't have to have conflict at all. She SO didn't get it. I ended up just trying to get her to agree that she would try harder to listen and be respectful, and I would try harder not to yell at her. Seeing how I really don't yell at her very often at all, I'm pretty sure I can keep up my side of the bargain, but I'm not sure she's going to even try her side. She just kept trying to justify why she wasn't listening, and how it was somehow my fault. DUDE! HOW, HOW, HOW do you teach a child to be respectful, and take responsibility for their own actions without punishing them on occasion? I don't think it's possible. I'm starting to think it's not possible in general, but I'm holding out hope. Is there some brilliant parenting book or something out there that I'm missing out on? Some miracle technique for instilling good behavior in your child without making them feel threatened or guilty? I always wanted my child to feel like she could talk to me, and we'd discuss things together, and that has SO backfired. She's a constant debater, and she feels like doing what I ask her is totally optional. NO MORE. I am drawing the line in the sand. Talk back to me, and you WILL get spanked. Sorry. Has to be that way.

Whew. OK, time to stop venting. Moving on. Trying to allow and make space for the good behavior to happen. I have been working hard at "catching her being good", positive reinforcement, and all that. It does seem to help increase the positive behaviors, but doesn't do too much in decreasing the negative ones. I think probably a big part of it for me is that she's changing so fast, physically and emotionally, it can be hard to keep up. I really don't know how people can do it with more than 2 kids. This is PLENTY of drama for me, thanks.

Anyways, we got to school with no major drama this morning. After last night, I was mentally preparing for dragging her kicking and screaming into her classroom, so I was pleasantly surprised when she cruised right in with no muss, no fuss. A couple girls called out to her from the playground on our way by from her class last year, and I think that made her happy. There was also a very sweet girl from her last year's class who's in her class this year, and sits in her little desk cluster. So cute, they have their own desks this year. It's starting to feel like real live school more than just kid corralling. Zach and I hung out for awhile and helped get school supplies sorted, and names put on glue and scissors. There were a couple other moms with little kids there too. It was really nice. Her teacher last year would only have moms in to help without the toddlers in tow. So, unfortunately for me, that meant I wasn't able to help in her classroom, as we didn't know anyone here, and didn't have any daycare options. Mrs. Moreno seems much more willing for siblings to be around, and Zach really is well behaved in those kind of situations most of the time, so I'm looking forward to being able to be in her classroom more. I was literally giddy walking out to the car, feeling secure that she was doing ok, and engaged in her new class. I REALLY hope that a little more structure and outside interaction will make a big difference with the attitude issues, and not just be one more thing to stress about.

My plan was to seriously clean the house today, what with only one child in it to distract me, but I've blown off the whole morning already. I did manage to get up BEFORE the kids this morning and grab a shower, and that NEVER happens, so I'm feeling pretty good about that. I do need to go through the little piles of Madeline's papers that are floating around and decide which drawings to save, what stuff is from last year that can be thrown away, and what to hold onto, and then of course where to put it. The neverending sorting of the crap. My favorite.

Just Because

I don't know what to write about today, but since I'm being hassled by my sweet sisters to post something, I figured I better. So, here's a brief update on the Krause House goings on. Madeline starts school Thursday. That's right, THIS Thursday. Clark bought her some new tennis shoes while we were in Flagstaff this weekend, and that pretty much wraps it up for school shopping. There are the official school supplies to be obtained, but I haven't decided if I should shop for the list I got off the internet, or wait until the teacher adds whatever he or she might add to the official list. We still don't know who her teacher is going to be. I had thought we'd maybe get a letter from the school, but still nothing. Nothing on the internet either. In Utah, they post class lists on the front door of the school, so we made a special trip to the school yesterday, but no lists there either. I have no idea how or when we're supposed to find out who the new teacher will be, but we better figure it out soon.

Madeline is somewhat apprehensive, and feels like summer was too short, but she's not having the daily meltdowns I was expecting. We stayed and played on the school playgrounds yesterday after having not found out who her teacher will be, and I think it might have reminded her that school can actually be kinda fun. I hope so anyways. I'm saving my own personal school panic for the first day. After our experiences last year in moving her to a new school, I'm a little concerned about her behavior and attitude this year, but hopefully she will get a wonderful and brilliant teacher who can manage her better than her mother currently does. Anyone think that will actually happen? Nope, me neither.

Zach is doing pretty good. He's looking pretty funny right now in the aftermath of a bad haircut, and a fall at the breakfast restaurant in Flagstaff our last morning there. He bit his lip in a couple places, and managed to bruise his chin pretty good. Talk about drama. I didn't actually witness the fall, but the blood spewing from his mouth afterward was enough to throw me into panic mode for the rest of the day. Don't you hate that? When you kid gets hurt and you have to stay calm so they don't freak out, then you spend the rest of the day with this residual adrenalin heart racing wanting to throw up kind of feeling? Add to that having to say goodbye to Boobecca, and a healthy helping of PMS, and I was in rare form for the drive back to Albuquerque. And, well, pretty much the whole next day too. Wow, I really do suck sometimes.

I'm feeling a little better today. PMS is still kicking my ass, but I'm feeling a little more capable of kicking it back. A whole night full of sex dreams does wonders for a girls positive outlook. (Woo Hoo!!) Trying to decide if today is the day to bust out the "Organic Garden" green paint for the accent wall in the master bedroom. Maybe after lunch. We're going to try to go out to lunch with Clark since our opportunities for lunch out as a whole family will be significantly curtailed by the start of school. Speaking of, I guess it is approaching lunch time, and maybe we should all get dressed now. TTFN

Parting is such sweet sorrow

It would appear that we have lost our cat. We acquired the cat right around when Clark and I got married. She was found by a friend of ours in Parowan, and Clark rescued her from being taken home to see how she got along with said friend's two very large dogs. I enjoyed her somewhat as a kitten, but Clark had a bad habit of playing rough with her and letting her bite his hands and wrestle. This, of course led to us having a cat who didn't know how to play nice. She used to attack us at night while we were sleeping, so I insisted she be chased out of the bedroom at bedtime. She also was merciless about clawing the furniture. I tried my best to allow her to claw one of our old crusty chairs in the office in the hopes that she'd stop clawing the new couch in the family room. No luck. She destroyed (I mean, seriously destroyed) our 2 couches, and the box spring in the bedroom, and when she put a large scratch down the side of our new leather chair I insisted she be declawed. I also learned pretty quick that I have a serious aversion to cat hair, probably since I never had pets as a kid, and my mother is a neat freak anyways, but I couldn't stand the nasty black cat hair EVERYWHERE.

She was pretty happy in our first official house. She was obviously an inside cat, since she had no claws by this time, but we had an old basement (pioneer era, dirt floor and all) that she liked to hide and play in. We didn't see too much of her unless it was really cold and she came up to sleep by the fireplace. The trouble started when we moved into the new house and had Madeline. A move and a new baby didn't do much to impress the cat. It probably didn't help that she didn't have a hiding place any more either. She started pissing on my new carpet, which I must tell you, I was totally unimpressed with. I, having my hands more than full with a brand new baby, told Clark it was going to be his responsibility to clean up after the damn cat. He didn't do such a great or thorough job of it, unfortunately, and she continued destroying the carpet. This was the beginning of the end of my tolerant relationship with the cat. I eventually had professionals in to clean the carpet, which included replacing the carpet pad, and several stages of nasty chemicals. The pissing on the carpet seemed to get under control, but shitting and vomiting on the carpet were still very regular occurrences.

Enter, child #2, sweet Zach. As I've mentioned before, Zach is/was terrified of the cat, for reasons known only to him. So now, the cat was not only a mess making, fur shedding, nuisance, she was freaking out my kid. Forgive me, cat lovers, but I was starting to hate the cat. As much as I tried to care for her, it's just not in me to be a pet person I'm afraid. The cat and I started giving each other a wide margin around the house most of the time. When we decided to move to Albuquerque I told Clark I really didn't want to move the cat. I was stuck in Cedar by myself for the last month or so, and was NOT going to manage driving the kids AND the cat to Albuquerque. He made a half-hearted attempt at finding the cat a new home, but didn't. When he came home for Christmas, I laid it on the line, the cat will not be in my care when you leave, whatever that means. So, he took the cat back with him to his little studio apartment. Whatever. The new house has white carpet (who's great idea that was I have no idea), and the black cat hair is an even bigger pain here than it was there, but we do have a laundry room for the cat box, which is a huge improvement over it being in my closet, which is where it was in the old house. She has also regrown a few claws, and had started destroying furniture again.

To wrap up this cat story, which is getting too long, a few days ago, Clark asked me when the last time I saw the cat was. I had no idea, hadn't even really noticed that she wasn't around. OK, so, we assume she's hiding somewhere, and will show up again soon. Another day goes by, no cat. So, night before last, Clark goes on the cat hunt. The cat is not hiding, as a matter of fact, is not anywhere in the house. Neither of us has any idea how the cat would have got out, or where the cat might be. She's not typically the type to run away or try to get out, and the couple times she's wandered out the back door, she has immediately cried loudly to be let back in.

Clark is pretty sad about losing the cat. I feel for him, and I know his sorrow is real. I, however, am feeling just a tad guilty that I'm not really sad about losing the cat at all. I'm choosing to believe that she got out, and had one big kitty adventure out there in the big world, and that if misfortune has befallen her, it was quick and painless. The kids haven't really noticed that she's gone, and I'm not sure how we'll approach it with them when then do notice. I'm thinking I'm going to go for the kitty adventure track, but maybe without the possible misfortune aspect. In any case, it seems to be farewell to the cat, may you find peace and lots of couches to shred in your next incarnation.